localfreak: avatar which I have used as mine since scarboard days 10 years ago (Default)
For those of you (if there is indeed a 'those of you' to be addressed here) who friended me in more recent times one of the first fandoms I was actively involved with (along with HP) was Savage Garden.

I owe a lot to that fandom, which was smaller than some but popular enough that there were some marvelous writers (and the not-so-marvelous, not gonna lie, myself probably included). I still remember Callycat's heartbreaking angst fics (oh so many. I suspect, but cannot confirm, that it was from these fics I learnt what AIDs was apart from "a terrible disease they show on Comic Relief") I learnt a lot about sex, about romance and sexualities from those fics. Fics by LindaG, Stine, Lunaflower and of course Carolyn, whose astonishingly well-plotted fics came late to the fandom but taught me a lot about authorial spark (I can't remember what her tag was back then but she's Oh my Cee on twitter now).

The fandom lasted for a good while after the group's disbandment, but ultimately everyone began to disappear. I found LindaG somewhere else on the internet once, blogging about non-fandom things, and as I have said, Carolyn is on twitter periodically, but mostly everyone has disappeared.

I still worry about Callycat every time I think of them.

But I digress. There is a new album release out called 'Savage Garden-The Singles' - a collection of their old hits, including 'She' which was never released.

So the notification came up on my facebook page- as usual Savage Garden and Darren Hayes' pages both updated within seconds- it is always obvious that it is Darren Hayes and his team that maintain the page. Anyway so then Darren posts a link on twitter to an interview he did with Renowned for Sound about the release.

And on the webpage there is a link to An interview with Daniel (rarity of rarities) on the same.

And well, I don't want to influence your judgement but I thought that cut for opinionated spoiler )

...But BY HEAVEN I wish I knew what the fandom people would be saying right now.

Heart attack, you stabbed me in the back. It's whack your mind is jack, how did anybody ever get like that?

I should kiss your dirty lips for bringing me my clarity. And now the truth has let me see, how your lies have buried me

And I felt your slipping fingers, and I saw you change your mind. If I hadn't dragged you in with me you would've let me dive without you

Every angel has dirty hands, even Judas planned to just carry on. Still picking up the pieces of those lies behind those sorrowful eyes you can walk away
localfreak: avatar which I have used as mine since scarboard days 10 years ago (Default)
Yesterday was quite good although I was very,very tired by the time the dinner had been cooked and I'd done all the washing up. So I watched Wreck It Ralph and re-watched Tangled which were on the telly followed by the new Sherlock.

I really liked Wreck-It Ralph actually, though I missed the beginning. It was very cleverly done and quirky. Tangled had me in tears, as is the norm for most films these days. It's just that her parents look SO SAD and they've been missing their daughter for EIGHTEEN YEARS and it's all just heartbreaking.

Sherlock I...Cut for SPOILERS )

Today I and The Family went to a nearby town and to Primark and then around the shops. I paid so I am feeling suddenly very poor although I did get another Harry Potter themed t-shirt and a Harry Potter themed jumper. Just a shame that some of the t-shirs with HP quotes on were not nice enough for me to buy despite the quotes being good. And there was an Iron Man t-shirt which would've been awesome if it hadn't been semi-see through!

Got some new trainers for Deichmann's anyway, which has been a desperate need as my old ones let water in. As it hasn't stopped raining for what feels like the whole year, but is at least most of Autumn and all of Winter so far, shoes that let water in are a terrible, terrible thing. At least until my webbed feet and gills come in.

The mood soured towards the end because Nanny got tired but is stubborn so it took ages to cajole her to stop and have a hot chocolate, and then it was all petty stuff on the way home with everyone winding everyone else up. Oh and apparently I've got to cook sunday dinner tomorrow as well. I am not impressed. Also, I hate beef and I hate gravy. It never works.

Cheered myself up by playing with my new colouring book and starting to listen to the Big Finish Dorian Grey which still_lycoris has lent me. I'm liking it so far, although Oscar Wilde sounded rather cooler in the first episode than, according to Stephen Fry, he actually was. (I watched a programme about Stephen Fry the other night and he discussed starring in Wilde and getting to snog Michael Sheen and Jule Law etc phwoar. And he said whilst researching he met someone who had known Wilde and imitated his voice which was much more clipped-vowel-high-pitched than Fry played it because it would've been annoying.)

Added a few more fics to my tiny offerings for the 12 Days of Christmas challenge though, too. So that's good. Sadly, Mum was out then and she is now in and watching the telly so I don't know if I'll be able to get that focus back.
localfreak: avatar which I have used as mine since scarboard days 10 years ago (Default)
In 2014 I read 37 books and watched 16 films, according to my records although I am suspicious that my record-keeping has been rather shoddy this year and there are some I have forgotten to put on. This is a further sad decrease in books and films from previous years.


Best book I read for the first time in 2015 was: Friends of the Dusk by Phil Rickman- the latest Merrily Watkins. Although I really enjoyed Eleanor and Park by Rainbow Rowell.

The worst book I read in 2014 was:
Exchange by Paul Magrs. It isn't a wholly objectionable book, but I just felt like it was flimsy and, for a story about book lovers, surprisingly dull. The plot seemed weak and ill-formed.

The funniest book I read:
No! I don't need reading glasses by Virginia Ironside. I always find her writing light and fun.

I also want special mention of Brummie Road by Ian Richards, which would definitely be among the best of new writing I have read this year. Any book framed around football that can make me enjoy it and see worth in, at least, the social connectivity of the game, is exceedingly impressive.

In Films, many of the ones I watched this year were new to me: Avengers: Age of Ultron, Pride, Antman, Wreck-It Ralph and the rest were re-watches. The best of the ones I watched for the first time this year were probably Pride and Age of Ultron.

Pride wins, on the basis that not only is it wonderful, I get to watch it going "THIS IS MENTIONED IN JEFFREY WEEKS' BOOK!" and "DYER TOLD ME ABOUT THIS" "IAN MCKELLEN MENTIONED THIS IN AN ARTICLE WHEN I WAS SIXTEEN" in gleeful queer glee.
localfreak: avatar which I have used as mine since scarboard days 10 years ago (Default)
Behind the Candelabra is a 2013 film about Liberace’s relationship with a young man called Scott Thorson. Starring Michael Douglas and Matt Damon this story is a biopic based on a book written by Scott Thorson about the experience.

I’m not going to dwell on the film in the sense of its quality- although I will say with actors like those two in the lead roles what can you expect but reasonably good performances- but about why it made me rather uncomfortable watching it.

Cut because I talk for a long time about this )
localfreak: avatar which I have used as mine since scarboard days 10 years ago (Default)

Well, on Christmas eve I had my annual the house is a pit of hoarding shite and I am filled with shaaame and then went to church to sing and then on Christmas day went to church again (downside: same homily which was about the persecution and suffering of Christians which consisted of reading aloud from an article in the telegraph and mis-pronouncing almost every foreign word or name.).

I had a good Christmas day really, feel very spoiled and people liked the gifts I gave them. I got a lot of fun things including a game called 'You Cannae Push Your Granny Off the Bus' which I need to convince people to play with me and a LOT of superhero themed things including:

Avengers notebooks
Wolverine's Dog Tags
A (DC) Superheroes cushion made by my Uncle-by-marriage's mother
An Iron Man mug (from still_lycoris)
An Iron Man wall light (from one of my Uncles)
A wobbly-headed Hulk, to go with my wobbly headed Wolverine

oh, and today I went to pick up a shiny new laptop. Which just happens to be Iron Man hotrod!red (it's not, really, it's Ferrous red but I WILL PRETEND).

Mum and I cooked dinner on Christmas day which went well and I had a glorious boxing day of moving As Little As Possible and Lying In Bed Reading.

I have also been writing (a little) for the 12 Days of Christmas fic challenge although as of yet have not got ANYTHING written for today. (I can think of portents of doom but am failing on fandom and plot). Nontheless there are many excellent fics on there from far better writers than I if anyone fancies a gander.

If anyone needs me I will be continuing my epic-re-read of Laocoon's Children (of the Stealing Harry verse by copperbadge and playing with my new computer.



AND A 'D' key that DOESN'T STICK!!

Merry Christmas everybody.
localfreak: avatar which I have used as mine since scarboard days 10 years ago (Default)
I'm back on twitter- I didn't last long. New pseud, new feeds, and much happier for it.

Started writing out my Christmas cards this evening (urgh, the laptop's 'd' key is only working intermittently which is proving very frustrating.
localfreak: avatar which I have used as mine since scarboard days 10 years ago (Default)
It is very hard not having twitter. Not just for the tweeting, but also for my feed- reading what everyone is saying, having something to scroll through before I get out of bed in a morning.

I can't really let on how much it has bothered me at work because *hand wavey complicated people suck* reasons.

People always claim that social media killed the art of socialising, but I think for many of us it enhanced it. I know what I'm like, the chances of me keeping in touch with my friends from college after we all left would've been extremely slim if facebook didn't appear when we were at Uni, but my facebook is by necessity very censored- it had to be, the moment that friends-who-were-actually-aquaintances-with-shared-interests or university-project-partners appeared on, and that has only continued as family members, my altar servers, distant relations, people from church, poetry and singing continue to be added to it. I didn't LIKE adding people from work, but unfortunately when I started and people added me I couldn't work out how I could say no although I never actively request anyone. So these days my facebook tends to be sharing local news (e.g. road closures, local events), arranging meetings and occasional photos of the dog/Blue Flower. Oh, and what I'm reading.

Twitter was mine. When I was alone in strange cities, sitting in solitary cafes with no one to share things with, I tweeted. When I wanted to rant, I tweeted. When I wanted to laugh, I tweeted. It has been my vent and PURE FUN. I wouldn't rant about fanfiction or bad spelling on facebook, or ever say if my mood was poor. These days that kind of thing prompts people assuming you want an actual conversation or, at the least lots of "u ok hun?" "hugs" "thinking of u xx" "msg me if u want 2 talk" which NO. NO. I don't want to talk and I don't want attention or hugs I just wanted to speak, vent, to be a voice crying in the wilderness, to Talk To Myself.

Anyway. I have 30 days (just under) before my account properly dies so I can change my mind and change my pseud there if I want but because of *handwavey can't explain here* Reasons I am not sure this method would prevent said Outer from finding me and causing trouble.

Soo...I'm off now to take the grandmother to see the Mikado at the pictures. Hope it's a good show!


Dec. 1st, 2015 09:59 pm
localfreak: avatar which I have used as mine since scarboard days 10 years ago (Default)
Well it has definitely been one of thos evenings.

There is a relatively high likelihood I am going to disappear from twitter for a bit (and I need to think up a new pseud. I don't want to use localfreak because I don't want to invade this part of my online life too heavily).

According to twitter I can change my @ name without deleting my account...but I'm not sure how that works with regards to shoring up anonymity issues, because somehow despite my real name, hometown and workplace not being on there someone from the work's official twitter team tagged me when promoting something I did in work. I PM-ed them and they took it down.


And I am not liking it one tiny bit.
localfreak: avatar which I have used as mine since scarboard days 10 years ago (Default)
Tonight I finally got access to the television and watched The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel. I saw it when it came out at the cinema, and bought it a few years ago where it has sat in the cellophane ever since.

It is hard to watch films at home, because I don't actually like watching films on my own, when Mum is in the house. This is why she has control of the television most of the time- because I will sit in the room and, if not always watch (often I'm reading fanfic), at least we are sharing space peacefully. Wheras, if I put something on that I want to watch (so, when I still watched Agents of SHIELD, before I fell off the wagon) she tends to leave the room and go...do ironing or something. It's not a new thing- there is a reason I had a video player in my room, but it...I do like having someone to watch WITH. Anyway she kind of watched. She laughed a bit at the beginning and then played Patience on the tablet the whole time...but oh well.

I'm feeling a bit emotionally fragile now, because GRAHAM AND MANOJ and it is SO SAD and BEAUTIFUL and I know it ends so lovelily and positively but that just makes me MORE likely to spend half of the film in choking sobs.

Which I duly did- and no sunny walk home from the pictures to compose myself with.


I'm a bit moody and changeable at the moment. Frustrated by the mother who has not telephoned for an electrician. She has painted a wall. Because, you know, obviously that was more important than FUCKING LIGHTS. Urgh. Well. There's not much I can do unless I raid her documents and ring the guy myself. Which there's not much point doing as I'm never home and I have no idea when she is. So that's a bit of a bugger. And you know, stresed about my job and life and December and wanting to make time to spend with people but at the same time I have assignments to do and work and there's not enough hours in the day. Zog just texted me asking what I was doing this weekend (read, did I want to do things with her) but we went out for a meal last Saturday (which was lovely) and I do have vague plans to go to Manchester tomorrow so I cried off. I feel bad but I need to spend time with the mother too. She doesn't see anyone but my Nanny all week and it can get really tense and I worry because she doesn't go out to have fun or join clubs to make friends...and Cliff has been dead some years now...and I just worry. Particularly in Winter. I just want her to be happy- I want all of them to be happy- but they seem to just...not be very good at trying to find ways to have fun themselves. If I had been a reasonable little freak and produced some grandchildren by now we wouldn't have this problem. But we do. And I don't get why no one but me worries about these things. Zog and I once agreed that between us we probably worry enough for the whole family between us.

Keep on Keeping On. I think maybe that's why I like Marigold Hotel so much:

It will be alright in the end. And if it is not yet alright, it is not yet the end.
localfreak: avatar which I have used as mine since scarboard days 10 years ago (Default)
Here I am again, procrastinating over course-work. I've done obscenely little considering I've been sitting here sifting through papers for a good half hour or longer so far. I'm just SO TIRED.
Today we had a meeting in work that lasted almost the entire day, and I was already in a grumpy mood BEFORE that happened so I'm basically looking to move into the wheelie bin and be Britain's answer to Oscar the Grouch. I reckon I could pull it off.

Tangentally, I lost my first tooth whilst having a dream about Oscar the Grouch. I dreamt that I had a piece of these weird triangular toys (I think they were called pentagon clips?) we had in Reception class in my mouth and was watching Oscar the Grouch who was swaying side-to-side in his trash can singing "A Grouch has gotta do what a Grouch has gotta do" over and over. And then I woke up and thought the toy was in my mouth and spat it out, before realising it was my tooth.

I then called my mother and made her search the fluffy teddy bear carpet for said tooth because I was scared to get out of bed and squash it.

My poor mother.

In my defence, I was five?

EDIT: I have corrected so many spellings in this post, it just shows I am barely awake.


Nov. 8th, 2015 07:15 pm
localfreak: avatar which I have used as mine since scarboard days 10 years ago (Default)
Well I had a good time in Sheffield, even if I did embarrass myself a little bit as after the third cocktail my body decided to skip drunkeness and go straight to hangover so I had none of the fuzz just immediate headache followed by several (not entirely sucessful) secret trips to bathrooms to throw up before it all came out of my nose instead. Of course, once I'd been sick the headache miraculously disappeared and I was sober and alert and chirpy again...but I can't help but think that, though everyone pretended not to notice, my inability to eat + flustered dashing may have been a factor in the fact that everyone decided to leave the pub after the main course and drink tea back at the house instead...*headdesk* stupid body so ashamed.

BUT it was good seeing my friends for the first time since the wedding last year and how exciting to be starting to plan the next! So that's all good. And we played board games and really cool games using their chromecast-the first I have ever seen IRL and hooking up our phones/tablets to play which was HILARIOUS LARKS.

I've just sumbitted my two assignments (due tomorrow) to the tutor. I am sure they are not good and keep telling everyone this but inwardly I just want them to be passable and then I don't have to do anything to them. I realise this may be heavily unrealistic considering I've written them over several late and exhausted evenings and have just done the final check through whilst recovering from travel. - In fact, as I wrote this I realised that I failed to use the checklist for the second assignment so just had a quick rifle through. Fingers crossed!

When I got home I discovered Nanny had held dinner for me so got lamb and new potatoes and cabbage with home made rice pudding for afters -YUM! Before taking the dogs out for a walk, I think they missed me. Then mum dropped me off at Mass because parking is horrendous there and it's miles too far to walk. She offered to come in and, as I put it, get 'godded' twice, but I said no- she's well glad that I did as not only were all of the hymns ones she hated (and the acoustics + effort from the congregation abysmal) but instead of a homily it was a lesson from one of the teachers from my infant school about the new Safeguarding Team which not only bored everyone to tears (especially as I HEAR IT IN WORK OKAY) but was tailored as if to an audience like MY WORK and therefore wholly unaccessible to a mixed congregation ("there are online assessments you can complete" for crying aloud, 80% of the congregation are computer illiterate FFS). Anyway it was drek and I feel awful about it but since St Raphael's has been left for rats to gnaw its bones my whole heart has gone out of it all. The community is gone and what is left is cold comfort. I still go because I am hoping that this is a phase I'm going through, that if I keep on going and just keep trying it'll click again. I still do believe, but I am also filled with private worry and doubt, and frustrated by the way nothing that goes on around me does anything but feed those doubts and fears. All we get is bad singing and hellfire and brimstone. Urgh.

(Seriously, as Mass last week we got a lecture on the -genuine- hierarchy of angels. I had to zone out or risk errupting in giggles with mum with Night Vale quotes:

"The city council would like to remind you about the Tiered Heavens, and the Hierarchy of Angels. The reminder is that you should not know anything about this. The structure of heaven and the angelic organizational chart are privileged information known only to the city council members on a need-to-know basis. Please, do not speak to or acknowledge any angels that you might come across while shopping at the Ralph's or at the Desert Flower Bowling Alley and Arcade Fun Complex. They only tell lies, and do not exist. Report all angel sightings to the city council for treatment." - Welcome To Night Vale- Pilot.


Nov. 6th, 2015 09:02 pm
localfreak: (carryon)
It's been a funny old day. And yes, here I am, it's Friday Night, typing away at Task B of my course work.

Oh, hang on actually, I better save the buggering thing. Haha. Wordcount 800-1000 and I have written... 1,880. And still feel like its not enough for me to pass. It is ridiculously unrealistic.

We still have next to no lights upstairs in the house. Mum did have a brief look in the loft when it was daylight, but realistically I think it needs an electrician.

Also realistically, we've needed an electrition for two other jobs for over twelve months so it's going to be hard work pushing the mother to accept this and I may be dressing in the dark for the forseeable future.

It's been a funny old day today. Lots of good things but also quite a lot of worries for the future...and money...and things like that. But I am going to do my best to ignore them because I can't do anything about them and, also, I need to get on as I am off to Sheffield tomorrow to visit a friend of mine who has just become engaged and it will be LOVELY. I'm getting the ten past nine train, so everyone pray for an early sunrise, as I will have to pack my overnight bag in the morning when I can see my bedroom further than the lamp by my bedside will reach :-/.
localfreak: avatar which I have used as mine since scarboard days 10 years ago (Default)
Well, it's the 5th of November, remember remember. The news tells me many things that remind me that right now, V had the right idea. The government are filthy scum-ridden, over-entitled monsters who continue to prey parisitically on the poor, the vulnerable and the disabled whilst lining their own pockets.

I am not watching the fireworks. Right now, I am sitting in the study which is one of the only rooms in the house currently with an overhead light, because for some reason half of the upstairs lights have died, attempting to work on my college assignments which are due in on Monday and I am in Sheffield all weekend.

Just shoot me now.
localfreak: avatar which I have used as mine since scarboard days 10 years ago (Default)
I have just finished reading a collection of short stories by Helen Simpson, In-Flight Entertainment, all different stories centred around a theme of climate change and global warming. It is a very good collection, some satirical, some humorous, some sad or poignant- made more so as I come into the living room and see Syrian refugies soaking wet, miserable, in the mud by the Croatian border. *sigh*

It was a really good collection, though, and I am darkly amused by the reviewers on good reads who rant about the fact that "this author obviously believes the propaganda of global warming activists" or "I do believe in climate change but I don't want it thrown in my face all the time" which is LITERALLY the POINT of several of the stories including In-Flight Entertainment, Geography Boy, The Tipping Point and Diary of an Interesting Year.


It is show day tomorrow. I am steadfastly trying not to think about it. Just hoping that we have sold enough tickets- so many of the others in the group have their whole extended families coming to see them. I bought two tickets and don't even know if anyone will actually use one of them (the other is my mum's, who is lovely and came to every night of Our House, where I was only a minor character so I a show where I have a main part in three numbers is unquestionable).
Although, at the same time I prefer people to just not come than lie and give excuses. After Our House quite a number of friends and relatives couldn't resist the next time they saw me with "I was going to come but....we forgot the date/worked late/you were sold out" - the first two aren't too bad but the latter is a GIANT LIE. We ran Wednesday-Saturday and mum bought a ticket on the door most nights. And it's awkward, I mean, all I can do to reply to that kind of comment is "Oh it's fine," which it IS, but WOULD BE MORE FINE IF YOU HADN'T JUST PUT ME IN THIS AWKWARD POSITION AND JUST NOT MENTIONED IT AT ALL.

So anyway. Show. Fingers Crossed.

I'm off to the Capital then for a day and a night...somewhat anxious about this as my friend has bought the train tickets but has not provided the detail I would like (e.g. the time of the return journey, the time of the show we are going to see). I booked the hotel anyway so have printed off maps to both the hotel and the show venue, which according to google maps is 3 minutes by tube...so I'll have to buy an Oyster Card again (I get them, and then because I hardly ever go to London, I then give the cards away which is stupid).

Travellin Thru
localfreak: avatar which I have used as mine since scarboard days 10 years ago (Default)
Dear me, I've neglected to post a lot here. Okay so I had a reasonable birthday, very quiet but then I find it increasingly hard to get too excited about my birthday the older I get. I always found them a tiny bit awkward-as a child I did rather prefer Christmas where everyone was happy and getting presents (or that's how it felt) rather than spotlighting on me. I got some nice wooden mice from my Auntie Ig and money from various relatives, notebooks and chocolates from my enablers *cough* friends, and a cool hiking/trail bag from a friend which, along with the money, immediately went on a 2-night holiday in the Lake District. Mum and I stayed in Rydal and on the Saturday we did the coffin trail backwards, going up Rydal Mount to Wordsworth's house, then along the trail to Grassmere, then down on the other side of the Lakes to get back. It is one of many coffin tails, in which coffins would be transported across the hills and fells to consecrated ground- by how narrow and rocky the route was, mother and I couldn't help but indulge in macabre discussions about unquiet ghosts who'd had their coffins dropped a few too many times, or slipped and rolled down the hill and never recovered, of fallen out of the coffin and the guts exploding....

You can't say I don't come by my grave humour honestly.

It was a good holiday, anyway, characterised by long and wonderful (whole body aching) hikes and terrible food.

I went to visit my Uncle R yesterday after an eye test and met his new pet, Marcus the Cat. I am pleased to report that despite the initial discomfort-mild-terror Marcus and I made tentative friends and I was demanded into stroking him and playing with his toys (of which he has many, he is a very lucky little cat after a bad start to life including a road accident). So we're friends now. Mum was also incredibly relived Marcus had decided I was quite enough human to occupy his time and therefore didn't approach her too closely. Also the drugs worked as I didn't end up with burning eyes so all is good.

On Thursday I went with friends to see Welcome to Night Vale Live in Manchester. AND IT WAS AMAZING. It was so good. Cecil's voice is EVEN MORE WONDERFUL in person and also Cecil Baldwin is incredible graceful and has very beautiful hands. Lots of fun in the queue waiting to get in- I was relived it wasn't just us who were all dressed up. There were hooded figures (who no one paid too much attention to), a lovely person called Erika who was definitely not an angel despite beautiful wings, and the Glow Cloud (ALL HAIL). Wonderful fun. It sometimes feels like I want to shout WHERE ARE YOU PEOPLE NORMALLY? Because suddenly it's like all these wonderful people appear out of the woodwork who UNDERSTAND and GEEK and know what TUMBLR is and FANFIC and then poof disappeared back to IRL and so many people who don't even know what shipping IS.
localfreak: avatar which I have used as mine since scarboard days 10 years ago (Default)
Well I had a lovely weekend with friends at a birthday party in which much fun was had and I have eaten my weight in carbs and cake.

Today has not gone so well. I had a meeting with some people on Friday who agreed certain things and who now appear to be back-tracking on said agreements, which makes me feel stressed and also humiliated because I feel like it looks like I was in some way incompetent in the initial negotiations (which I probably wasn't, on the basis I went to the meeting prepared for difficult negotiations and they offered me more than I thought they would so I was like 'okay cool, I did not expect this to go this smoothly'). Argh.

But I only have tomorrow in and then I am on leave which will be lovely. Mother and I have booked a couple of days away whilst I am off. In truth a big, tired part of me would be more than happy spending my annual leave at home reading books and cleaning things, but I know that if I attempted this it would not happen- instead I would find myself tailing the mother, fetching the dogs round at lunchtime as usual, ferrying Nanny, tootling round the shops on errands etc etc. So it's best really to have a couple of days away where, whilst I'm not likely to get lots of time to read at least I will not be easily accessible by the calls of duty and routine.
localfreak: avatar which I have used as mine since scarboard days 10 years ago (Default)
One of my co-workers really loves cats. I mean, REALLY loves cats. She has two and not a day goes by that they don't come into a conversation. I know that it sometimes irks my other co-worker who has a lovely little dog, mostly because as much as she adores said dog, Masie doesn't come into daily conversation in quite the same way. But I mostly don't mind. After all, she loves her pets, why wouldn't she want to talk about them in the same way people I know who have children want to tell you 'that funny thing they said this morning'. It's fine. It even makes me mellow a little with regards to my conflicting emotions concerning cats (sometimes I am capable of finding them very friendly and adorable, othertimes they instill immense terror (when attacking) mild discomfort (oh god it's looking at me) or immense fury (CAT POO ALL OVER MY FUCKING HANDS AGAIN MY GARDEN IS NOT YOUR LITTER TRAY. Oh god disease! death! WHAT THE HELL IS THAT BLOODIED BABY BIRD DOING BY MY DOOR SOB SOB SOB).

So I have, in my attempts to be nice and supportive of someone else's loves, occasionaly looked for pictures of cute cats and shared them with said co-worker, in the same way that when I think my other co-worker is having a bad day we bond over cute photos of puppies. I have also come accross several kittens lately looking sweet and fluffy and therefore have been in one of my 'sometimes cats are okay' phases.

Until this morning when I pulled up outside my Nanny's house and a cat was sitting by the drive looking insolent before sauntering away leaving:

Oh you guessed it, a starling. A juvenile starling, legs in the air. Nanny came out of the gate just as I noticed it and I got out the car to get a bag off her to bag the dead bird and put it in a bin.

And it moved. It was dying, obviously, legs twitching uncontrollably, possibly its back was broken. I couldn't move. Nanny, who spent her war from the age of five being made to skin rabbits and gut chickens and therefore is not a coward, scooped up the bird and took it away...to, I can only assume, put it out of its misery before binning it. As she lifted it, I could see its eyes were open and it was shaking, beak open in shock but it was alert enough.

I then found out the cat had been ouside with said bird for at least fifteen minutes, as a man had knocked on Nanny's door to tell her something about a cat and a bird but as, at the time, she was holding back Snoopy who was having his medicine she hadn't got to the door in time to ask him to explain. Other people had been in the street, standing around. Doing nothing.

I don't know who is the worst, the cat - "playing" with its victim- or all of the people who passed on by.

I hate people a lot of the time anyway. Now I'm right back to disliking cats again. EVERY TIME I MELLOW A BIT TOWARDS THEIR SPECIES SOMETHING LIKE THIS HAPPENS.

At least the dogs only eat the occasional slug when un-watched.

I don't know if I'll get the images of that poor bird out of my head any time soon.
localfreak: avatar which I have used as mine since scarboard days 10 years ago (Default)
So I wrote that kind of sullen and stilted post yesterday. Sat in front of the t.v. watching the pre-midnight bookshop queues of Pratchett fans and suddenly it all made sense.

Whether it's the season (and that big old moon) that causes the gloom or the gloom as a natural occurance. I went to bed and cried for Mr Pratchett's most avid reader who is no longer around to queue till midnight.
localfreak: avatar which I have used as mine since scarboard days 10 years ago (Default)
It's a big ol' moon tonight so that means my mother, who is at least half-werewolf, is tired and gloomy and doesn't know what to do with herself. We had a walk arount the block before it got dark at least.

I've been working on a presentation this afternoon that I have to give on Tuesday. Then I need to do a more complicated presentation the week after so I need to make one for that too. I'm not horrified by the prospect though am a little anxious and am therefore not looking forward to the Bank Holiday too much. Could do with making some plans for it, I think to keep the mother occupied. I'd quite like to see a film but we'll see.
localfreak: avatar which I have used as mine since scarboard days 10 years ago (Default)
It was the mother's birthday yesterday and the semi-secret party went off very well indeed. She had presents to open and there were mountains of cake and even our little Blue Flower had fun toddling around with a miniature pork pie in one hand, making a great mess on the glass of the staircase by kissing her reflection in it.

To give an idea of the food:
Individual wrap slices
Mini pork pies, plain, with bramlet apple and with branston picke on top
Sausage rolls
scotch eggs
chicken legs
vast little sandwiches

Home made cakes:
Chocolate cake with pouring cream
Raspberry trifle
Fruit salad trifle
Carrot cake without icing
Carrot cake with icing
Fruit and nut cake with Ameretto

Bought cakes:
A huge raspberry sponge cake with a photo of Mum aged 3 on it with stars etc, design courtesy of yours truly with help from the Asda's cake printing service

A beautiful iced cake with yellow flowers- content as yet unknown but I'm hoping for a fruit cake!

Quite the feast, though there were a lot of mouths to feed with it.

Much fun was had by all, anyway, and we're going to see Priscilla, Queen of the Desert at the theatre next weekend as part of her present, and I also managed to find the first two seasons of Old Harry's Game a radio show about the devil, played by Andy Hamilton, that we both adored when it was on. (If it is findable online, I do recommend it most highly.)


localfreak: avatar which I have used as mine since scarboard days 10 years ago (Default)

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